Creamy Cauliflower Soup

1 head cauliflower
3 cups water
3 Tbsp nutritional yeast
4 Tbsp miso
3 Tbsp tahini
1 Tbsp soy sauce
2 Tbsp rice vinegar
4 tsp Dijon mustard

-Chop cauliflower into manageable florets.
-Bring a pot of water to the boil and cook cauliflower until tender. (5-7 minutes)
-Remove from the heat and drain in a colander.
-Place water, nutritional yeast, miso, tahini, soy sauce, vinegar, and mustard in the food processer and blend until smooth.
-Add cauliflower to food processor and blend to a cream.
-Heat and serve warm.

(Based on a soup by: http://www.veganuary.com/recipes/creamy-cauliflower-soup/)

Vegan Fried Rice

Rice
5 cups cooked long grain rice

Scrambled Tofu
½ block extra firm tofu, pressed for at least 20 minutes
½ tbsp nutritional yeast
¼ tsp salt
¼ tsp onion powder
¼ tsp freshly ground black pepper
½ tbsp olive oil
2 garlic cloves, julienned

Vegetables
2 tsp olive oil
5 brussel sprouts, cut in 8ths
1 1/2 cups frozen peas and carrots
4 Green onions for garnish (optional)
1 cup bean sprouts (optional)

Sauce
2 tbsp soy sauce
¼ tsp salt
½ tsp freshly ground black pepper
¼ tsp liquid smoke
1/2 tbsp tahini
1 medium garlic clove, minced or grated
½ tsp onion powder
1½ tbsp rice wine vinegar
1 tbsp brown sugar


Scrambled Tofu
-Crumble the pressed tofu in a small bowl.
-Add nutritional yeast, salt, onion powder, and pepper. Mix well and set aside.
Heat the oil in a medium pan over medium heat.
-Add minced garlic and cook for a minute or so, or until the garlic has browned lightly.
-Add tofu mixture and cook for about 5-7 minutes more, stirring often. Remove from pan and set aside.

Sauce
-Whisk together all of the sauce ingredients and set aside.

Putting it all together
-In the same pan that you used to cook your tofu, heat 2 tsp olive oil over medium heat, then add in the carrots, peas, and brussel sprouts.
-Cook for about 5 minutes
-Add rice and sauce, then tofu and chopped green onions.
-Cook for about 5 more minutes

Cheesy Potato and Broccoli Comfort Casserole

2 tbsp flour
1 (13.5 oz) can coconut milk
5/6 cup nutritional yeast (because fuck you)
2 tsp spicy brown mustard
1 tsp paprika

Whisk flour with coconut milk in small saucepan, then cook over medium heat until sauce thickens and bubbles.  Remove from heat, stir in other shit, cover.



1 cup pork-flavored dry TVP
1 cup water
½ bag of frozen chopped onions and celery
5 cloves garlic, big-ass ones
1 lb chopped broccoli
1 (14 oz) can diced tomatoes with chilis
2lb potato fries/hash browns (precooking optional for more crispy texture)
1-2 tbsp hot sauce

Preheat oven to 350º.  Spray bottom of casserole dish with oil, cuz reasons.

Mix ham bits and water to soak.

Sautee onion.  Mince garlic and add to onions.

Realize you forgot to thaw broccoli.  Pour it into pan and warm it in oven for 10 minutes.

Pour fries out over broccoli.

Mix all remaining ingredients with cheesy sauce, and then pour over casserole.

Bake 45 minutes.

Inspired by Nutritional Yeast Cheese Sauce on Our Fresh Kitchen and Flavorful Tater Tot Casserole on AllRecipies.com.

Tofeta, Kale, Quinoa, and Chickpea Casserole

1 pound extra-firm tofu
2 tbsp water
4 tsp yellow miso paste
¼ cup balsamic vinegar
1 tbsp lemon juice
1 tsp salt
2 tbsp nutritional yeast

Mix everything but the tofu, then mix in the tofu with your hands.  Completely forget to add nutritional yeast.


1 bunch kale
All that tofeta you made above
1 cup quinoa
1 (15-ounce) can chickpeas
1 tablespoon of lemon juice
2 plum tomatoes, diced

Preheat oven to 450.  Place aluminum foil on baking sheet, spray with oil, tear kale into large pieces on sheet.  Roast 6-8 minutes until slightly crispy. Try not to eat it all before adding it to the casserole dish.  Save foil.

Actually read through rest of directions.  Hollar at how wack they are.

Chop them maters.  Sprinkle that shit on your casserole.  Also sprinkle (drained) chickpeas and (rinsed) quinoa on top.  Stir.  Boil the water with the lemon juice.  Pour over the casserole, then add fetofu mixture.  Stir again if you feel like it, but probably not.

The oven is already at 450º, so I guess it should stay there.  Cover with saved foil and bake 25 minutes.  Realize you forgot to add nutritional yeast.   Rationalize to yourself that you'll just sprinkle it on when serving.

We have 19 minutes.  Let's do this.

Eat.  Realize it's too watery.

Spread it out and bake for 20 minutes more.  It's super effective!

Inspired by Vegan Feta Cheese on the Happy Herbivore and Baked Quinoa with Roasted Kale and Chickpeas on POPSUGAR.